I forgot how hot balto sounded
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
