Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
