Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
