Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize