Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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