For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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