Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
