you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
