I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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