He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
My penis needs a shock collar
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
