Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
