Your tits are I can't wait for
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
