Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize