Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
