It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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