You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
