We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i came on her dog
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
