I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
He? As in you personified your dick?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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