i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
