Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
