Apparently you make a good broom.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Michael Bay diarrhea
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
