dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
