went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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