so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
