I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize