I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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