It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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