is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
