handjob tips. give me some.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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