my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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