how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
