Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Randomize
