he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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