UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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