so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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