I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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