About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
