You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
