Got a toothbrush?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize