wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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