fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
