is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Oh god it's open bar.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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