I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
