i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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