god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize