I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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