I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
