He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
The struggles of a small town man whore
My legs feel like baby dolphins
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize