apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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