but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize