I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Randomize
