your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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